Pulling teeth and saving souls....

Today we make another trip to the dentist. The girls need their teeth cleaned so fortunately I won't have to prostitute myself on the street in order to pay for it. My hubby's meager dental insurance pays for cleanings twice a year, so yay. No sore asshole for me today....

Speaking of prostitution, I stopped by to see the good old mayor yesterday. While I was chatting with him, a nice little old lady came by to see him. She was the sweetest thing and I felt no L.O.W.L.H (little old white lady hate) coming from her. She was really pleasant. So imagine my surprise when the mayor told me about her posting signs near her house, advertising for a man. He said the first couple of signs, he went and took down himself, but the rest he had the police do it. I guess she had been advertising for a man and said she would pay well. I know it didn't mean anything to her but to someone else...well..it sounded like she was soliciting.

I wonder if the policeman he sent was "You Check"?(not the correct spelling, but that's how you pronounce it. He was one of the police officers that Randy asked about on The West Virginia Surf Report. And no, I was not straddling him to fix the mower, it was Elliot AND the entire thing was completely innocent too. It was the way the lawnmower was torn apart in the storage building and we couldn't get to it. I had no other place to stand besides on top of him. Later in the day our deputy sheriff came to help and then he got to help do the dirty work while I mowed.
Anyhow...getting back to "You Check". He goes around and preaches when he is on duty. I mean, it's nice that he is a faithful man and everything, but I don't think he's supposed to do that kind of thing when he's on the clock. He also stops and passes out candy to little kids and asks them who loves them.(He tells them Jesus.)It kind of reminds me of Kojack, except "You Check" has all his hair and he is short..much shorter than Telly Salvalis. Plus there is that vampire alert that goes off when he approaches you and smiles at you, holding a fistful of suckers.

Today is Elderly Hell Day too. I can't believe I scheduled an appointment today. Now this means I have to leave the house and go somewhere THIS MORNING!!! Normally it's not terrible later in the day, but in the morning...well..I'm endangering the lives of my children. On Tuesday mornings,the Florida of West Virginia is one of the most dangerous places on the face of the earth. I'm going to try a different route to get to the interstate, so perhaps I will survive the ordeal. As long as you don't go anywhere near Krogers or the drug stores on Tuesdays, you can remain relatively safe.

I have to go prepare mentally for the perilous journey...wish me luck.