Just typical stuff...

So what have I been doing today you ask...
Weellll...
I got up and got the kids ready and off to school. Then I came home and had coffee, called a friend, fed the animals and began to sew.
About an hour into the sewing, the dentist office called. The same asshole who refused to pull my wisdom tooth because I'm "too old".
Yeah, well anyhow, my regular dentist explained that whole thing to me and it's not that I'm too old, it's just that since I'm 41 and it's never bothered me before, he doesn't see any reason to pull it. It's very close to my sinuses and he figured the risks weren't worth it if it doesn't bother me.
He apparently has difficulty communicating and that's why he didn't know how to explain it to me.
So...while I was sewing the dentist office calls me and reminds me of my appointment to get the other two teeth extracted on Monday.

Flipping whoop-de-do!!!

So this gets me thinking.
I'm going to be miserable and unable to eat next week. So I rationalize in my head that I can go ahead and eat that ice cream for breakfast because I'll be fasting next week.
So I stop sewing and eat some ice cream.
Man oh man, was it a GREAT breakfast. Beats the hell out of shredded wheat any day!

After breakfast I notice that the dog is looking longingly outside. I feel kind of guilty about not walking her this morning, so I decide to play with her inside for a few minutes.
My house is set up so you can walk in the front door, go into the living room, then dining room, then kitchen and back into the foyer where you came in. It's a circle. So the dog and I are running around my house in a circle. When I passed through the kitchen I noticed a can of whipped cream on the counter. So the next trip around, I stop, open the can and start squirting that stuff down my throat.
Great fun!
Then, with the can of whipped cream in my hand, I begin to run through the house with the dog again, periodically squirting whipped cream in my mouth.

Several trips around, I think I catch a glimpse of someone at the front door.

I do.

It's my oldest daughter's boyfriend. He is standing at the door with his mouth hanging open with a horrified expression on his face.

I open the door and ask him,"What's up?"

He tells me that my daughter sent him over for the cat carrier because their cat Miss Kitty is sick and needs to go to the vet.

"Ok." I tell him. "I'll get the carrier and be right back. Would you like some whipped cream?"

"No...no," he declines politely,(although I can see by the look on his face, he's terrified I'm going to squirt him with it or something.)

Heh heh heh....

I walk down the steps to the basement while he remains on the porch waiting and get the cat carrier.

When I get back upstairs he grabs it and runs for the car, yelling "Thank you" over his shoulder.

I resume running through the house with the dog and squirting whipped cream in my mouth.
I wonder how many calories is in that stuff?
Meh...it doesn't matter.
What does matter is that my neighbor that lives right across the street is watching me now.
She's pregnant.
When I saw her outside the other day, I asked her if she was going to have any more children after this one.

"NO!!!" she almost screamed at me.

I wonder if she watches my house more often than I think she does and has decided having children makes me the way I am?
Maybe she is afraid she'll turn out like me?
What a shame that she doesn't realize I'm just like this. Having children hasn't changed anything about me except the flop and flab factors. Other than that, I'm still the same as I've always been.

On the last lap around the house, I waved at her. She grabbed her belly and ran into her house.

Why do I get the feeling that I'll be a prayer request in church on Sunday?

Anyway...that's my day so far. My friends say I should get a webcam and charge for people to access it. I'm considering the whole thing, although I'm concerned I would forget I was being watched and end up arrested for indecent exposure. I mean, sometimes I get crazy ideas like trying to make prints using finger paints and different parts of my body.
I stained my nipples blue once trying to make my honey a love note with blue boob prints. I couldn't believe that it stained them, but it did. Took a couple days at least for it to wash off all the way.

Yeah..it's almost 11:30. I have to get busy and do something responsible now.

Occasionally I do that, you know.

Act responsibly...

*wink*