Tripping, virginity and a white moon....

Did NO ONE catch on to me making "pee pee" the word of the day TWO DAYS IN A ROW?!?!?!

Yeah...I didn't either. So today's word will be "dumb".
I'm really fond of the word dumb.As a matter of fact, my sister-in-law is always telling my brother, "God Art, you're so dumb."..(except when she says it,the 'you're so dumb' part runs together to sound more like 'youresodumb'.

Veggie Stick will have conniptions because she tells Little Beatle he's dumb everyday...should be a fun night here at the funny farm.

Speaking of funny farms...the trip was exhausting but good.
Friday afternoon we began our journey. We traveled to Gallipolis and ate supper. It was my very first time eating at a Golden Corral restaurants.



I told the cashier I was popping my Golden Corral cherry and she rushed me through the line. They also sent an employee into the restroom when I was washing my hands....a big, strict looking gal who had manly hands.



Who knew it would be such a big deal? Perhaps they thought I was planning on having sex in the restaurant? I mean, I don't eat out that often so I've never been to a lot of different restaurants.I've never been to a Ryan's or red Lobster either. Does that make me a freak? I may or may not have had sex in a restaurant but that doesn't necessarily constitute freakiness does it?

I saved my freakiness for later on that night....

We followed the bus to our destination.That didn't necessarily mean the bus was going where it should be though. The driver turned off on this road that took us out to God's country, where there was nothing but empty corn fields as far as the eye could see.
He later said there was a problem with the GPS setting, but I don't know....he was a strange dude...
Anyway, while we were sitting there in the children of the corn land waiting on the bus driver to decide we were lost, I had to pee. The bus was in front of us, then my friend's dad's van and then the friend I rode with's car.
So I told her and I was going to get out and pee behind her car...She objected and told me not to and so did the other people who rode with us, but I HAD to go...BAD!

I got out and in spite of the frigid temperatures, I pulled my pants down and squatted to pee. It was at that precise moment that the bus decided to pull forward and turn around. Well...the rest of the vehicles followed, leaving me exposed to the entire world, crouched in the middle of the road with my pants around my ankles.



Apparently my friend had 'forgotten' I was behind her and just followed her dad. When she looked up in the rear view mirror, she said all she could see was my white ass sticking out and me squatting in the middle of the road. She was at least ten yards away from me but I could hear her and my other two friends laughing inside her car....

Hmmm....I'm sure it would have made a beautiful picture...



So...AFTER that experience, I decided to stop drinking stuff and wait until we got to the hotel.

We got to the hotel late and let me tell you, the guy working there was a HUGE douche bag. A guest called down and complained about the noise. Instead of telling the guest that a bus had just arrived and the noise would subside as soon as everyone was checked in, he yelled at us and threw a fit. You'd think that he would be more concerned about accommodating a reservation of almost forty rooms and be a little less concerned about one guest...
Hours of grueling travel left me exhausted and constipated...I wanted to kick his bitchy little ass...

By the time we got settled in and got to bed it was 2:30. I slept OK, but strangely enough my friend, who is ALWAYS complaining about her husband's snoring, snored...all night long. I'm guessing it's only because she was as exhausted as me, but I mention it because I thought it was ironic...LOL

Saturday morning we got up early and hit the road. We made it to the competition by 10:00 a.m. and spent the entire day there.....



There's not much to add to that except I saw a few of these....



and few of these watching the cat fights....



THESE GIRLS ARE IN HIGH SCHOOL FOR GOD'S SAKE YOU DIRTY OLD SOCKCUCKERS! (Sockcuckers sounds a little nicer than the real word for it, don't you think?)

We got back to the hotel around 1:30 A.M!!! And we were all noisy as hell too!!! It just can't be helped...there's almost a hundred of us. What are we supposed to do? Medicate each kid and drag them off the bus and into their bed? It didn't take more than twenty minutes to get everyone off the bus and into their rooms though...it could have been worse.

Sunday...got up...got on the road and followed some other people who had to stop every five minutes to pee. It was so bad the bus got back an hour ahead of us.

No one tried to buy me on this trip.I felt very proud of that too. Perhaps it means I don't look like the kind of girl someone would offer money for anymore? Who said getting older is a bad thing?
Besides...I'm not impressed with ANY man who can't give me the time of day unless he's horny. He'd better be taking the time and calling. The men who have deserved my attention in the past worked for the privilege, you know?They didn't just call me up when they felt like getting their dick sucked. I don't put up with that shit. I'm serious...You see the way these boys disrespect their girlfriends at these events and you think to yourself how horrible it is that they have so little self esteem, they allow these boys to treat them like whores...it's TERRIBLE.

Not surprisingly enough, my mood for today is this...



I'm sleepy. It's not even 11 a.m. but I think I'm going to go lie down and take a cat nap. I can barely keep my eyes open....