I could write good commercials....

I had a dream last night that I jumped in a pool of jello. It was so cool and refreshing, at least in the dream, it made me wonder why I've never seen a commercial like it. I mean, cool and refreshing is a big seller. There are tons of soft drink commercials that push cool and refreshing. Even the York Peppermint Patty commercials are cool and refreshing and you know...the last time I checked, chocolate, even chocolate covering peppermint, is not cool and refreshing. It makes me thirsty.
So...getting back to what I was thinking about...In my jello commercial I would definitely think it would be a great advertisement for jello if it involved an entire pool of the jiggling, sparkly stuff. I mean after all, Jello IS cool and refreshing. In my dream when I jumped in the pool I was instantly refreshed (although the nudity probably helped with the refreshing part). And it was great because unlike pool water, when I got some in my mouth I had only to swallow and there was yet another refreshed feeling.

I really think it would be a great commercial...well...without the nudity.

I'm a commercial genius.

Maybe I can dream about feminine hygiene products tonight. I'm really tired of their commercials because they're not true. There is NOTHING refreshing about putting a pad in your panties and wearing it around for several hours, catching the remnants of your uterus every month. Now let me tell you, that is one commercial where freshness doesn't sell. Everyone knows that with women, it's the pretty packaging that sells. Or if she is a tight wad swede like me, it's whatever is on sale that has the prettiest packaging. Being somewhat bitchy and bloated, we want to surround ourselves with something that makes us feel pretty. If only they sold Monthly Moo Moos. I can see a market for this if it would become socially acceptable. We could hide our padded asses and our bloated bellies beneath mounds of fabric and not worry about squeezing into our pants. It makes us terribly bitchy to have to squish ourselves into pants and then hide the fat roll that ultimately comes with the too tight pants. You know..the one that hangs over the top of our pants that looks like a bicycle tube? We attempt, usually with no success, to conceal it with loose t-shirts.(Normally we use our husbands t-shirts. The ones that end up with chocolate stains on them. That's where the stains are coming from boys)
So see? There would be wonderful benefits from a Monthly Moo Moo.
Another benefit of a Monthly Moo Moo... HUGE pockets we could fill with chocolate bars and cans of Hersey's chocolate syrup. I'm telling you people...bright colorful dresses, comfortable and comforting with pockets of goodies...They would have to sell!It would be heaven. Women would no longer have PMS. We would be free for one week to give into our natural instinct to waddle and eat chocolate!!!

Why won't anyone listen to me? I know all the answers here...really I do.