But today I wanted to be different.
Speaking of different, that can be the word of the day.
CLANG..CLANG..CLANG..DING...DING...DING...WHEEEE!!!
I read everyone on my blog roll over there on the side where it says, People who make sense to me. I always get something good out of the thoughts and opinions of the people I read daily, but today I got a huge kick out of Tiff's and BuzzardBilly's stuff.
I'm still laughing....
I plan to begin a new book today because I will be trapped at the doctors office with my daughter for hours. It's Janet Fitch's newest book, Paint it Black.
I loved White Oleander and believe me, the book is much better than the movie. I don't think I will be disappointed with this book either.
Although it's Elderly Hell Day and I would prefer to hole up in my house, I am required to go out in it and travel the treacherous highways. With the scads of huge Maw Maw cars weaving in and out of the lanes, I'll be lucky to make it home alive. I thought getting all the laundry caught up today would be a great feat but I'll be happy if I just live through today. I find that most Tuesdays survival is the utmost thought in my mind....
I was thinking about myself this morning and trying to view myself through someone else's eyes. I mean, I'm not really a normal person...at all. Actually I think it must take a special person to be able to be my friend. There has to be a lot of tolerance involved.
I'm freaky and kooky and silly. Almost to the point of irritation at times. I fart...a lot and laugh loudly at myself when I let a particularly musical or loud fart, often resulting in butt chuckles(many little farts in a row that make my ass sound like it's laughing.)
Yeah...my ass is registered as Democrat..LOL
My mind is wandering so...
I have a question...which isn't being asked for any particular reason, but I'd like some opinions on it.
First, allow me to lead up to it by sharing a little Mr.Man trivia with you.
When Mr.Man and I were first married, before cell phones and GPS technology, he used to go out for entire days without letting me know where he was or even when he'd be home. I didn't CARE that he went out to do his thing,(we've both always been independent people)but I thought it would be considerate of him to let me know where he was going in a general kind of way and what time he would be coming home. Even an estimate would have been appreciated.
I wasn't trying to keep tabs on him, but I wanted to be able to reach him in case of an emergency. Trust issues were not a consideration.
I wanted to know roughly what time to expect him home so I could make dinner or in the event he ended up being several hours later then he had told me, I could make phone calls and make sure he hadn't been in an accident.
Call me a bitch...(he did...plenty of times) but I thought I deserved enough consideration to be informed so I could reach him if I needed to.
Isn't that what relationships are all about? Being there for your significant other if they need you? (This is not the main question I want to ask, by the way)
He's gotten better over the years and we both carry cell phones so we can check in on each other to make sure everything is ok. When he travels out of town, not only do I have his cell phone number, but I have his work number and his hotel number as well. I have the security of knowing how to reach him if I need him.
Yeah...maybe he can't get home in ten minutes but he's there for moral support for me and the kids if we need him.
So...my question....yeah, maybe it does have something to do with a conversation I had with a kid over the weekend....
I talked to this kid I know and he was pretty upset about something.
I guess that when his father is out of town, he seldom answers his cell phone and will NOT give his hotel number to his family for those occasions he can not be reached on his cell phone.
So my question is this....
Why would someone NOT want their family to be able to reach them when they're out of town?
Even with a worse case scenario of arguing between the parents or just needing rest, etc...when there are kids involved, wouldn't you think it would be reassuring for the kids to have a way to reach the absent parent at all times?
I can't IMAGINE a good reason why anyone would do that to their kids.
So can someone enlighten me?
Yeah...well...I've been on here longer than I wanted to, so I need to get off and finish my cleaning before I leave for the doctor's office.
My mood for today....
I'm having a bad hair day and I have to keep my eyes peeled for the Elderly Hell Patrol.
It's very scary for me...
Hopefully I will be back tomorrow....
Good luck on elderly hell day. I can't think of a good reason not to leave contact numbers. I mean I leave for 2 days and I leave any and all contact numbers available in case something happens with the person dogsitting.
ReplyDeleteWell, one, I might think he was cheating on his wife or maybe he just wants to get away from his family and have some peace & quiet. Regardless, it's still inconsiderate.
ReplyDeleteI am obsessive about leaving contact info...not even so much for an emergency (although that is a good reason) but because it is considerate for all the same reasons you had about wanting to know where your hub would be and when he was coming home.
ReplyDelete*whooo* long sentence that.
I have told my teenagers that too. They think I am prying and I say NO it's just so that when I call the police looking for you I don't sound like an idiot-duh, no officer I have no clue where he is today, or what he is doing.
I doubt there is a GOOD reason. At least not good for anyone but him.
ReplyDeleteGee Scott, I hope that's not the case.
ReplyDeleteI would like to think he wouldn't do something like that.
He has no idea of the threats his son has been making if his parents get a divorce. It scares me.
I'm really worried for the kid, you know? I had no idea how desperate and helpless he felt about everything until I talked to him.
Okay, either he's cheating or he's an ass - or both.
ReplyDeleteI'll be honest. . .
ReplyDeleteWhen a man (or woman) with a family goes out-of-town, they should ALWAYS leave hotel and work contact information AND answer their damn cell phone when family calls. Only a total boreass would not do that. Why wouldn't they?
I've spent lots of time out-of-town with work and play. I never once didn't call my family at least once per day, especially in the old days when we didn't have cell phones.
There were times in my distant past when I wasn't always behaving properly while out-of-town, bu that NEVER prevented me from staying in touch with my family.
I'd say any guy who does what you describe is really behaving badly and just doesn't want their family anywhere near him.
Oh, and did I mention that the guy is a complete and total recreant boreass?
CHEATER! JUNKY! JUDAS!
ReplyDeleteFirst three things that popped into my head, dude. The only time someone does that is when he/she is doing something they aren't supposed to.
If you know the man in question, you should try to let him know that his son feels emotionally abandoned (emotional withdrawal IS like breaking up or getting divorced, without the paperwork and the right to scream about it).
ReplyDeleteWhatever he's doing, he either needs to stop doing it or at least make it possible for his child to speak to him when he needs to.
I would say cheating too, but I have known ex-drinkers who fell off the wagon and people who suddenly fell in love with a new drug do the same kinds of things. Ditto that for gambling. Whatever he's doing, he's already stopped actively caring about his child and there's no excuse for that.
Thanks for the mention too.
You should talk to the son about being honest to his father. Tell him: If you have a problem and you do nothing to fix the problem, you only ensure that you are going to continue to have that same problem. Explain to him that he doesn't have to argue with his father about it. He just needs to say, "Dad, I love you and I know you love me, but I miss you. Sometimes I need to talk about things you only talk to a Dad about. I miss you when you're gone and I would feel a lot better if there was a way for me to contact you when you're out of town." If Dad hesitates, have son reassure him that he understands he's very busy on the road and he won't give that contact info out to others (Dad could be avoiding the wife and son is getting caught in the middle.)
ReplyDeleteIf Dad can't or won't comply, nothing's changed and Dad shouldn't be angry.
I suspect the kid is avoiding the confrontation because he believes in his heart that his dad doesn't care about him and doesn't want that confirmed. Poor little guy.